Create Food, Warmth, and Smiles... All Year Long!

Another holiday season has come and gone. The time of year when people pause their work life to spend a little more time with their family and friends--cultivating a sense of community and warmth.  I know the holiday season may be daunting to some; however, for me, it is a special time for all of my favorite things: family, friends, food and fitness.  Simply because the holidays are over does not mean the party has to end. My recent trip to the Palm Beach Wine and Food Festival reminded me of just that.  It was an extraordinary, five-day festival that tickled all of my senses.  My sister, Sweet Loren, brought me to this event as her assistant.  As a foodie, a lover of people, and an avid beach walker, I was in heaven!  Every morning, I took a walk on the beach and spent some time meditating in the sun.  The days became more decadent when we ventured off to 3 course lunches and dinners--tasting delicious food created by some of the best chefs in America.  Francios Payard prepared my favorite meal of the week.  The lunch started off with a fresh crab salad, followed by a mouth watering miso-glazed Chilean sea bass, followed by a decadent stuffed quail, and finished with a mind-blowing hazelnut candy bar dessert.  Tasting these flavors and experiencing the rhythm of the meal with strangers was so inspirational for my soul.  Eating such beautiful food in a communal setting created an atmosphere of warmth, smiles and mindfulness.  I watched myself and others let down their barriers, share their stories and fill their bodies with love as we all ate, tasted and savored each bite.

I walked away from this dream-like week with a deeper sense of gratitude and appreciation for the human spirit-- understanding we are all humans who strive to connect to one another and grow from our experiences.  I was reminded that a delicious meal can act as a vehicle for cultivating meaningful relationships.  So just because the holidays are over does not mean we should stop putting intention and love into the meals we create and the people we share them with.  Instead, it should inspire us to deepen our relationships and put more effort into what we are doing and whom we are doing them with.  Allowing ourselves to still take pleasure in celebrating each day, each other, and what we feed ourselves. Allow the nourishment and warmth of the holidays to continue throughout the year.  Create special memories and moments with strangers and loved ones.  Witness how sharing meals open up doors of generosity, laughs, support and love.

Empower your words. Empower your life.

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The new year creates a sense of hope, optimism and desire for a fresh beginning.  We tend to start off telling ourselves that this year is going to be different because of X, Y and Z.  However, come February 1, some of us might find ourselves falling back into old and “comfortable” habits.  So,  how can you assure that this won’t happen again this year?  What are some of the ways you can connect to yourself on a deeper level and stay true to your intentions and live the life you want to be living?  

One of the small, yet huge differences you can make in your daily life is paying attention to both your internal and external dialogues.  These are the words you tend to hear yourself saying out loud or in your own head.  Notice what your thoughts and beliefs are.   Do you hear yourself saying phrases like “I can’t, “I could never,” “I should,” “I ought to,” “I must,” or even referring to someone else and saying “they made me.”  When you say these phrases, you create helpless energy inside yourself and project it around you.  Saying such ineffective words can make you feel weak, disempowered, worthless, unmotivated and even lazy.  When we speak in such a fashion we are not moving forward in life.  Instead, our thoughts imprison us.  Be mindful of your word choices and feel empowered!  Use words and phrases such as, “I get to,” “I have the opportunity to,” “I can,” “I am able to,” “I look forward to,” “I choose to,” “I am grateful for,”and “I am lucky to.”  All of these word choices leave you with a sense of authority because there is clear intention and ownership.  Owning your words (even if you have to force it in the beginning) will bring you one step closer to owning your life.  

Try focusing on your word choices for as little as one week to see if you notice a difference in your mood, behavior and sense of purpose.  Feel empowered to be who you are and what you are doing.  Feel the strength and determination to create clear intentions.  Focusing this energy will bring you one step closer to sticking with any resolutions you may have made.

I know that owning “I can” empowered me to follow my passion of becoming a life coach.  I never let the words “I can’t” hold me prisoner and prevent me from fulfilling my sense of purpose.  Owning my words allows my beliefs, thoughts and feelings to be limitless.  I am living in a world full of possibilities.

I encourage you to share your experiences with me.  First ask yourself: “How is this current way of speaking serving me?”  Then, once you find your answers, ask yourself: “What ways can I make conscious shifts and start owning my words?”  “How does it feel to say more empowering phrases?”  “What differences do I notice in my life?” 

If you have any questions please feel free to contact me.  I look forward to reading them!

New Year. New Perspective. Same YOU.

The New Year is a upon us so there is no time like the present to PAUSE, REFLECT, BECOME AWARE and ACT.  I believe that the New Year is not only a time to make resolutions and visualize your future, but it is also a time to reflect and appreciate your past.  Without understanding your history and habits, there is no room for you to grow and expand in the present and future.  That is why I invite you to take some time to get in touch with yourself and reflect on what you learned in 2013.  Realize all you have accomplished (and I mean ALL!! Including books, projects or even mini tasks).  Be proud of the mountains you have climbed, whither they be big or small, and allow all of that confidence and positive energy to boost you forward into the new year. Let go of your worries, fears and doubts, and hold onto your inner strength and wisdom.  Remember, you can achieve whatever you want this year! Below are some helpful reflection questions to ask yourself as you learn about 2013.  Once you have completed those, answer the visioning questions for 2014 and see where you want to go this year.  A fun activity is to place your answers in a sealed envelope and wait until next year at this time to open it.  This way you will gain a deeper sense of reflection for 2015.

When you look back at 2013, what stands out to you?

What are you grateful for?

What skills did you learn/improve?

What big/ small mountains did you climb?

How did you challenge yourself?

How did you treat yourself?

What strengths have people complimented you on?

What healthy habits did you work on?

What self-awareness have you gained?

What is your favorite thing about yourself?

What 3 activities do you do to treat yourself on a regular basis?

Visualizing the future: What values do you want to live by?

In 2014, what are 5 items (big or small) you want to accomplish/ master? Learn to articulate what you want in life.

How can you connect and live as your authentic self this year? What would need to change?

When you close your eyes, center yourself with your breath, and allow your creative mind to visualize the future, what do you see? Describe the colors, sights, sounds, tastes, people, location and even emotions.  What arises for you?

What healthy habits do you want to incorporate into your daily routine? What would that look like?

What skill of yours would you like to strengthen?

What would you like to do more of this year?

How can you create a healthy life work balance?

What gifts do you want give to the world?

3 years, 3 years 3 months.

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Three years this week since I finished chemotherapy.  Three years three months since my mother lost her battle to cancer.  It has been a long and turbulent road filled with anxiety, heartache, and uncertainty, but I am here today standing tall, strong and centered. Life does not always unfold how we imagine. There are elements of surprise and sometimes elements of shock.  For instance, 2010 surprisingly started out to be the best year of my life. I was off to study abroad in Buenos Aires, where adventures, excitement and lust lay in the palm of my hand.  But how quickly life can shift and turn.  Not only was I smacked with a cancer diagnosis, ripped away from my study abroad experience, but worst of all, I lost the most precious person in my life at a time when I needed her most.  When life interrupts you, there are two options.  You can either crumble in the presence of turbulence or you can face the day practicing three components: Breath, Balance and Brilliance.  I chose the latter.  I chose to not let these life interruptions knock me down.  Instead, I practiced mindfulness by centering myself with my breath.  I maintained balance by incorporating physical activity into my daily regime to feel strong and stable.  And most of all, I lived each day Brilliantly.  Living Brilliantly means that I was connecting to my creative energy where I could stay open, honest and see the opportunity in everything.  Living by these three principles, brought me to a place of inner peace, light and acceptance.  I was able to finish my six months of chemotherapy, say goodbye to my mother, graduate college, move back to Argentina, find love, and solidify my passion to help others feel mentally and physically fit.

I am thrilled to announce the launch of my Life Coaching career. Celebrating my mission to help other young adults faced with life interruptions survive and thrive by practicing the principles of Breath, Balance, Brilliance.  Ensuring that this survival packet can get anyone through the darkest of days.

Turn That Frown Upside Down

Have you ever been stressed, anxious, hurt or nervous? What did those feelings feel like? Did you feel the emotion not only in your mind, but in some part of your body as well? If so, what sensations arose? It makes complete sense that our emotions will not only be discovered in the brain, but also be felt somewhere in the body. Our mind and body are connected! What you think and how you react affects your nervous system, which affects your overall well-being.  When you feel stressed you may feel this sensation in your neck, lower back or even your head.  When these displaced pockets of emotion arise in the body, it is a sign that one is not in control of his/her emotions and is not balanced.  Negative vibes have infiltrated the mind and body, weakening the nervous system, which can be very detrimental to one’s health.  In order to help release some of these toxic emotions from the mind and body, YOU must learn to keep your thoughts positive and judgment free. Train your mind to let go of negativity and view situations with a positive twist.  This simple trick will do you wonders!

Suggestions: Spend some time sitting with yourself. Draw your attention inwards.  Notice if there are pockets of tension throughout the body and slowly draw awareness to why you feel tense. Learn to connect the physical feeling to the emotion. Notice how your mind wanders to a negative sentiment.  This is completely normal, however, not what you want to turn into a habit.  Instead, try acknowledging that negative emotion or thought and twist it into a positive one. Let that negative weight float away while you try to view life with more positives!  Sometimes it may feel hard to see the good in something, but trust the process and realize it is there. Own that positive perspective and envision it.  Over time, you will watch tension disappear from your body, and you will live a happier and lighter life because you have found YOUR positives from within so you depend less on the outside world for reinforcement.

Don't Fall Back. Reflect Forward.

There is an energy shift in the Northern hemisphere as we enter into Fall where the weather cools down and the sun sets earlier.  A more rhythmic routine enters into our lives as everyone settles into the flow of back to school and back to business. We salvage the days where we get those final tastes of summer, before the cooler days set in.  We get to observe nature go into hibernation and rest up for its busy months of spring and summer.  Unlike the trees and flowers, we humans do not get a long extended break from our lives to recharge.  Instead, we need to take time each day to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT, and ACT.   We need to check in with ourselves and make sure we are living happy, healthy and true lives. A new season brings upon the opportunity to renew oneself, so try asking yourself: What lessons have you learned? What skills would you like to grow? What goals would you like to achieve?  PAUSING, BREATHING and REFLECTING on yourself are powerful tools to bring mindfulness into your daily life so you can feel recharged and invigorated throughout the winter months. Suggestions: Take and make the time in your day to connect to yourself.  Think about your values and goals and take action in creating a life where you are your healthiest and joyous self! Enjoy time meditating, taking walks, cooking, writing, dancing or creating art.  Remember to not FALL back, but REFLECT forward.  Be YOUR best self!

The Power of Our Steps

Walking is one of my most favorite activities. Born and raised in a “walking family,” I grew up learning to keep up with my dad’s pace and mentally preparing myself for long journeys wherever we went, yet it was not until I was a senior in high school when I gained my own appreciation for the sport. My love blossomed when I decided to wear a pedometer for my senior project. My goal was to walk 10,000 steps (about 5 miles) every day for 3 weeks while I raised money for an Obesity organization. After my second week, I felt a tremendous difference in my mood and body. I felt I had a stronger mind-body connection since I was moving more and getting the blood flowing. I paid attention to what I ate and how I felt on my walks. I also noticed I was just happier! No wonder a study at the California University in Long Beach found that the phenomenon of walking helps people to “ be happier, have higher self-esteem, be more into your diet.” I carried my enthusiasm for walking to the University of Michigan where I walked from North Campus to Central Campus most days (weather permitting). People began to know me as “the walker.” I realized that wherever I went, it would probable take me 15 minutes longer to walk than to rely on bus transportation—so why not get some mental and physical exercise in, while spending time outside and saving money!? I now incorporate walking into my daily routine as my staple form of transportation. Not only do I get time to think, but I feel more connected to myself and the world around me. I aim to inspire other’s to get moving and realize walking is a lot easier and more enjoyable than jumping into a car. My boyfriend and I also created a routine to take evening walks as a way to help with digestion, enjoy each other’s company and reflect on the day. I have even noticed that night walks have improved my sleeping patterns!

Suggestions: Get walking! Learn to get those steps in wherever you can. Try walking up the stairs instead of taking the elevator; challenge yourself to take walks during your breaks throughout the day, add nighttime walk-caps or swap happy hour for a walk in the park with a friend. Get moving and you will feel the mental and physical difference after just one week!

Healthy and Happy Fourth of July

Happy Independence Day everyone! The day of the 3 “B's” has arrived, as most of us will celebrate our Independence Day by Barbecuing, drinking Beer and wearing Bathing suits.  This day only comes once a year where us Americans like to go big or go home.  The challenge here becomes not over doing it in the food or beer department.  The question then becomes, how can we muster up enough self-control  to have fun, but not drive ourselves over the edge?

Below are some helpful suggestions about making this holiday a healthy and happy one, that wont make YOU feel bad about yourself the next day.

Suggestions:

1.     Get the endorphins and blood flowing by doing some form of exercise in the morning.  You will probably spend most of your day sitting and chatting, so get your body moving!

2.     Start off the day eating a healthy and balanced breakfast—consisting of a protein and carb.  It also doesn’t hurt to get some veggies in!  Having a solid breakfast will keep your blood sugar stable so you will feel on track as you head to your afternoon/ evening BBQ.

3.     Arrive to your BBQ with mindfulness in mind—take your time to say hello to the hosts/other guests.  Enter into your mindfulness state where you get in touch with your breath and feel the energy of your environment.  Anchor yourself in the situation so you feel centered and in control.  This will help you make smart decisions throughout the night.  (This means no running for the food/ drink table the second you get there).  Remember to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT as you feel good about what you decide to drink, eat and do.

4.     Food choices—make sure you are making decisions in tuned to what YOU are craving.  If you are craving that burger, GO FOR IT! However, maybe you would feel better to split it with a friend or eat it without a bun?  Don’t think about restricting yourself, but focus on eating smartly and mindfully.  Also, remember to load up on lots of veggies before reaching into the chip bowl.  Carrots, celery and other raw veggies are delicious to eat with salsa or other light dips.

5.     Focusing on the lights—once you have eaten your meal, spend your energy else where in the party.  Don't socialize by the food table as this may make you more tempted to snack.  Get yourself to play a yard game with friends, go for a walk along the beach or go mingle with someone new—fill your mind with something else than food.

6.  Hydrate!—Drink lots and lots of water! Remember to keep hydrated throughout the day.  This will not only prevent you from feeling the heat of the sun, but it will prevent you from over eating.  Studies have shown that your mind might think you are hungry, when in fact you are only just thirsty!  Add lemon or other fruit flavors to keep you quenched and hydrated throughout the day.

7.   Most importantly, HAVE FUN, BE SAFE and TREAT YOURSELF WITH KINDNESS AND RESPECT!

Basic Morning Stretches to Wake the Mind and Body

Before I sit and meditate in the morning, I like to perform some basic stretches to feel less stiff and get the blood flowing in my body. It is very important to start the day connecting your mind and body so you can act with complete intention as you walk, eat, work and communicate. I start standing with my legs together and feet evenly planted into the ground.  Engaging my core, I place my hands in a pray position near my heart.  I take a deep inhale as I raise my arms out to the side and circle up to reach the sky. Then with an exhale, my arms circle back down to prayer position. I repeat this exercise about 3 times so I feel length in my spine and limbs. This small movement also allows me to become aware of the power of my breath.

Feel yourself stretch and lengthen.

Next, I cross one leg over the other so the sides of my feet are touching.  I again, perform this same circling position with my arms, but this time, with my exhale I dive my head to the ground--reaching my hands to the floor as I bend over.  This stretch lengthens the hamstrings, calves, lower back and neck.  Hold this stretch for at least five complete cycles of breath before slowly re-stacking the spine, curling up one vertebra at a time and placing the hands back in pray position.  This stretch may feel especially intense since our bodies are extremely tight and stiff in the morning.  Repeat this exercise by crossing your other leg and maintain it for those same five deep, slow, and controlled breaths.  Try to stick with your deep breaths and feel how much deeper you melt into the stretch with every exhale.

After I complete this series, I sit on the floor cross-legged preparing for another stretch to awaken my spine and core. Inhale to prepare; exhale, placing the left forearm on the ground, stretching to the left while the right arm reaches over your head.  Keep in mind that the right hip stays planted into the ground.  You will feel this stretch in your rib cage, lower back, shoulder and neck.  It is important to hold the stretch for at least five breath cycles in order to allow enough oxygen to enter your body and release some of the morning tension. On my last exhale, I bring myself back to center where I inhale and then exhale as I drop my right forearm on the ground reaching over my head with my left arm. This time, I stretch my left side while keep my left hip on the ground.  Holding for five breath cycles,  I then exhale to bring myself to center.

Remember to keep your opposite hip glued to the floor so you feel that deep side stretch.

Next, I focus on the forward and backward bending motion of the spine.  Inhaling, I grow tall, exhale, and move my chin to chest as I curl down one vertebra at a time. I allow my head to fall into my lap. I inhale as I hold the stretch and then my exhale allows me to engage my deep core and re-stack one vertebra at a time as I sit even taller, back into my starting position.  Moving backwards, I place my hands gently on my knees as I inhale to prepare, exhaling, I reverse the movement and tuck my tailbone under, curling back one vertebra at a time. This creates a "C" curve with the spine.  Inhaling while holding the stretch, and exhaling, I engaging the core as I un-tuck the tailbone--re-stacking the spine, feeling even greater length through my spine as I come back to center.  I do this whole sideways, forward and backward stretch cycle three times in order to feel awake from my inside out.

Also keep that core engaged, scooping your abdominal muscles as you were the flexibility of your spine

Keep that tailbone tucked under and tension  out of your neck.

I complete these morning exercises by sitting cross-legged and recharging with at least 5-10 minutes of Mindfulness meditation--making myself mentally and physically stronger for the day!

Challenge yourself and try this morning routine for a week to see if you feel mentally and physically stronger!

Cooking Up Nourishment for YOUR Mind and Body

I have always been a foodie for as long as I can remember. This is due to growing up in a house where my family didn’t even finish its first meal of the day before discussing what we would eat next. We grew up trying to make each meal delicious, nutritious and of course: satisfying. I never use to take part in the cooking since I was the youngest of 3 siblings in a house where everyone was an amazing chef. I was, however, very much involved in the planning, critiquing and of course, 'dish duty'. It wasn't until I moved to Buenos Aires that my passion to eat good food expanded to learning how to cook yummy food as well. As I began to cook for myself, I realized how difficult cooking something delicious actually is. It took sometime to get my hands dirty and feel comfortable around the kitchen. I started to enjoy cooking more and more because I was not only creating more delicious meals, but it became another form of meditation. I realized sometimes I felt rushed to cook for no reason that I would chop my vegetables too fast and unevenly that my meal would end up a bit discombobulated and not as enjoyable. So instead, I learned to use my cooking time as a way to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. I used the action of chopping as a way to slow down my mind and breathe so I could cut with intention. I also worked on controlling my mind by being patient while boiling water or sauteing food. This waiting time works to breathe and enjoy the process of cooking--whether it be solo or with loved ones. The act of cooking something homemade means you are filling your mind and body with good intentions and love. You have thought about what ingredients and spices sound the most satisfying and nurturing to your body, allowing you to get to know yourself on a deeper level.

Suggestion: Start cooking! Whether it be after you come home from work or on the weekends. Make time to cook something delicious instead of picking up the phone and ordering in. You will be shocked at not only how much money you will save, but how much more satisfying meals will be, and you might just lose a bit of that extra weight! Plan out your meals ahead of time by thinking of fun recipes to try or just follow your instinct and through a bunch of things together. While you are cooking, pay attention to yourself and do not allow yourself to get anxious or frustrated. Remember the motto to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT, and ACT. Fill your meal with love and compassion by taking the time to make it that much more delicious and nutritious. When you focus on the task at hand and are in the moment, you always do a better job than letting your mind race in a million directions. Notice how much tastier, satisfying and visually pleasing your meals will be. Enjoy your meal by eating slowly so you can taste each bite and discover what improvements could be made to the recipe. Take note of how the food nourishes your mind and body so that you learn to fill yourself with only positive things!

Remember: You have one mind and one body, so let's learn to use them right! (and feed it right!)

New-Beginnings

Happy New Year Everyone! Luckily, the world did not end as the Mayan Calendar predicted; rather, others are marking 2013 as the year of ‘New-Beginnings.’ I find this particularly applicable given many important chapters in my life finally came to a close at the end of this year. Even though it can be sad to move on from the past, it is also exciting to look to the future--full of endless possibilities. We can never predict what our future might hold for us, but we can control our actions. It is important to make some time for yourself to follow the mantra: PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT.

I was lucky enough to create some time while I was on the beach gazing into the Atlantic Ocean. It was a peaceful place for me to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. I feel connected to the Atlantic because some of my mother’s ashes are there, and I feel her spirit when I stand in the water. I took the time to PAUSE my mind and body, BREATHE in the fresh ocean air, BECOME AWARE of myself and my surroundings, and REFLECT on this past year. I thought about how lucky I am to be standing here healthy, happy and breathing--while sadly, my dear mother is not. I realized I must continue to breathe and live for her and was inspired to not waste my breathe on petty issues or unpleasant situations. I must continue to ACT by living life to the fullest and accomplishing my own dreams and goals.

Suggestions: Follow the mantra to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. Create time to think about this past year and the goals you have accomplished and the people whose lives you have touched. Then think about this future year. Create a list of ways you can become a better YOU. I am not suggesting to create New Years resolutions (like going to the gym more) that don’t necessarily stick, but spend some time reflecting on your behaviors and create ways that you can slowly and consciously ACT. For instance, waking up in the morning with an optimistic perspective, smiling more throughout your day or just becoming aware of how you interact with yourself and others. Remember this is the year of ‘New- Beginnings’, so don’t let your past hold you back. Make sure YOU ACT and live each day bigger, better, and brighter than ever before!

Don’t waste your breath. You have one body and one mind, so make friends with them!

Looking to Nature

Have you ever been in a gorgeous place, trying to relax, but can't stop your mind from racing? This happens to me a lot. For instance, I was in the park last week trying to read and enjoy the springtime in Buenos Aires. I felt at such peace on this lazy Sunday, yet somehow I could not slow down my mind to concentrate on my book. In these instances, I usually use my mantra of "PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT" in order to gain control. Connecting with my breathe usually helps me slow down and center myself; however, in this instance, I was not able to gain control. So, I used another tool my mother had taught me. She taught me to direct my attention on something living in nature—be it a piece of grass, a leaf, flowers, or a tree. Spending energy on something living in nature helps to slow down, enter into the present moment and become aware of your surroundings.

While I lay in the park, I focused my energy on a gorgeous tree that stood in front of me. I told myself not just to look at the tree but to slow my mind down and focus on the shape of the leaves, the curves of the bark, and the length of the branches. Spending my energy gazing at every curve helped me slow down. It helped me reconnect with myself and be in the present. Taking that pause is important since it helps you appreciate where and who you are. It helps you to appreciate the beauty and simplicity of the world while you gain control of your thoughts and behaviors.

We must let the beauty and natural discourse of nature influence our lives. For instance, nature demonstrates how we should maintain composure and tranquility. Everything in nature flows to the natural rhythm of life instead of fighting against the currents as some of us humans do. We need to create an image and sense of nature within us so we may stand strong and tall likes trees and mountains while laying still and reflective like lakes and ponds. Always staying peaceful, open, and poised as the natural current of life continues to flow.

Suggestions: The next time you feel your monkey-mind jumping around, try to PAUSE, BREATHE, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. Get control of your breath and ACT by directing your energy on a flower, tree, piece of grass or even a piece of fruit! Anything green and living that is in front of you. Spend some time studying that piece of nature and notice its size, texture, color, shape and maybe even smell. Make a detailed sketch of the object in your mind so you can slow down to appreciate its beauty. When you are finished, notice how much more centered and strong you feel. Understand that you will have a deeper appreciation for not only your own mind and body but also for the living world that surrounds you.

Why do we RUSH?

Time. Time is a very precious yet scary 'thing'. Time seems to control our whole way of functioning given it organizes our lives--defining goals, deadlines and occasions. It marks our aging and sense of progress as both individuals and a society. We don’t really realize how fast time passes because we become so entrenched in the goals at hand that we lose sight of how precious each moment truly is. We do not recognize or appreciate that once this moment passes, we will never get it back. This sense that time is precious and we need to be as efficient and successful as possible creates an anxiety that infiltrates American Culture. People’s minds and bodies are filled with this constant need to be doing something, achieving something or rushing to some place. People feel like they should graduate college by a certain age, have a specific “respectable” job, be married by their thirties and live life according to a pre-designed rubric. However, we put too much pressure on ourselves to get from point A to point B by a certain time that we miss everything in between. We end up losing sight of who we truly are or what we truly want in life. I am especially targeting the twenty-something year olds, as this is a time in our lives to discover and explore ourselves. Everyone around me, myself included, feels this pressure to already be someone and be something according to the ideals of society. It is hard to break free from these societal norms when we live and breathe them everyday. I am not saying we should all wander life free of responsibility, plans or goals, but attention should be focused on each moment and each breath we take. Acting with intention each day to our TRUE selves and personal ideals; not letting time and societal pressures control our lives. If there is one thing I have learned, it is that life never goes according to plan, so why create one set in stone? Live in the moment and learn to hear yourself. Learn to hear yourself so you can hear others better. Suggestions: Get to know YOURSELF. Know what YOU like--or be open to seeing, tasting, listening, feeling and experiencing the world around you. Have experiences so that you may learn and grow as a person. Don’t let your life be ruled by time or expectations. Take advantage of the moment, and make it yours! You never know who you might meet or what you might experience that could change your life.

Climbing out of a RUT

I was recently in a dark and gloomy rut—just like the weather in Buenos Aires. This month had more grey and wet days than sunshine. This was not good timing as the 2 year anniversary of my mother's death approached (Aug 31st). I desperately needed those rays of sunshine to wrap around me so I could feel her love and have the strength to keep going. While desperately searching for her love and support, I felt this heavy sadness weigh down on my body—like a weighted jacket. I had trouble connecting with my breath or relaxing my body. I couldn’t breathe deeply, and my shoulders felt so tense. I tried to brush it off, but I couldn’t. I was snappy to the people I cared about the most, pushing them away as I felt I needed to crawl into a dark, destructive hole. On top of my sadness I felt frustrated with myself that I was sad when I knew I was in a good place in my life. It was a strange sensation for me to feel this sadness creep and grow inside and around me given I have not felt this way since living in Buenos Aires. I was so in-tune with these thoughts and feelings bubbling inside of me that I knew I had to create a way to climb out before I got too deep.

One morning while I was meditating, I had an epiphany: I had to stop putting pressure on myself to not feel sad. It was not wrong to be sad; to cry because I miss my mother and best friend enormously. I realized I had to let myself experience these emotions and not hide or bury them. It is not healthy to have the mentality that I should just “suck it up” or even pretend these feelings are not present. I have to face my emotions head on; maintaining faith that everything will work out as time allows these feelings to slowly pass.

During this “Rut” I taught myself to make the most of everyday and try to create my own bit if sunshine. With each new day, I treated myself to my favorite Pilates class, snack (obviously something related to dark chocolate), yummy coffee, doing art projects, walking, eating yummy and healthy food or anything else that felt good! I have learned that you have to make the best of every situation you are in, which means treating yourself to what SATISFIES YOU and makes YOU FEEL GOOD.

Suggestions: Since you have obviously been following the previous blogs you are well aware of certain strategies used to help you hear yourself better and know what satisfies and makes you happy. In case you have missed those blogs, spend some time slowing down, mediating, journaling and making a list of things you enjoy. When you feel you are in a “rut” or dark place in your life, make sure to treat yourself! Create your own bit of sunshine each day so that your day may be that much brighter… until the sun eventually comes out and you find you are no longer in your Rut.

Know YOUR Environment

Every morning I wake up with the intention to sit and meditate for only 5-10 minutes. I do this so I may start my day consciously aware of how I am mentally, physically and emotionally feeling. I start by sitting crossed legged on the floor, slowing down my breath and feeling my body relax. I take a mental and physical scan of my body and mind watching what sort of thoughts and worries float around and I notice if there are any tense areas that I need to breath into in order to relax. Once I have felt my body and mind meld into one, I bring my attention to the energy beneath me. I become aware of the energy that surrounds me. I feel the vibrations and noises of the city, the weather and the people that are in my life. I bring awareness to my world so I can act with intention. Creating this awareness allows me to start the day with a sense of cohesion and strength. I am able to understand how I am feeling internally, and I am able to recognize if I am in a healthy environment. I try to listen to myself in the morning before the noise and chaos of the day gets so loud that I may not hear my thoughts clearly. I have noticed over time that the days I do not do this, I feel disconnected, anxious and less in control of my actions--making me feel less the person I aim to be. I have come to understand that when my external environment feels unstable, I have to consciously create a more positive environment for myself. I do this by keeping my heart-center open and engaging others so that I can hopefully add some positive energy to their day, which ends up brightening my internal and external environment.

Suggestions: Spend a couple minutes in the morning focusing on yourself and your environment. Take this moment to PAUSE, BREATH, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. Feel what type of environment you are in. Let yourself feel the energy in the ground and the movement in the air. Notice if something feels out of sink and think of ways that you can create a space that is more enriching. This could mean you clean your room so things feel orderly and neat; you paint the walls to a more suitable color; you calm yourself and honestly clear the air on an issue with a friend/family member or associate; or you simply become more conscious of what type of people you surround yourself with. Spend sometime to reflect so you may come to understand yourself better. Sometimes we do not realize how toxic of a place we are in or how parasitic some people can be in our lives. It is YOUR responsibility to create the best YOU, and in order to do so, you must create space and time to hear YOURSELF.

Know YOUR Emotions

Getting to know your emotions and interpreting your actions is vital to understanding yourself from the inside out. When you cultivate a sense of mindfulness, you gain the ability to understand yourself from an internal and external perspective. You are able to physically feel thoughts and emotions bubble inside while simultaneously evaluating yourself from an outsider’s perspective. You become skilled at detecting your emotional triggers and gain strategies to help control them. For instance, over the years I have witnessed my emotions and learned I get upset when I create expectations in my mind that lead to sharp “disappointments” when they become a reality. I tend to create these scenarios where everything is planned accordingly. When something in my plan veers off course or does not satisfy my needs, I feel toxic energy build in my shoulders, neck and jaw—waiting to burst. I get so frustrated and waste so much energy. Why?! The world is not an easy place to live in, so why do we waste so much time trying to control it? In reality, all we can do is control ourselves. Building a strong mind/ body connection has enabled me to become aware of both my physiological and psychological reactions so I can learn to control them. To have strong expectations creates this imaginary life where you ‘are constantly vulnerable to’ and ‘constantly live in disappointment.’ To think things have to go according to a strict plan and cannot veer off course is impossible. Life throws us curve balls left and right. It is by dealing with them that you learn to find yourself and your path in life. Cultivating this skill set allows you to have more self-confidence and strength so that nothing can shake your foundation. This is why I try to prepare myself for life everyday and be ready for where it takes me. The most important thing is to stay open.

Suggestions: Start to pay attention to your internal dialogue and emotions. Take note of what makes you upset, angry, frustrated, happy, or sad. Once you find those scenarios that trigger emotional reactions, think about where that emotional tension travels in your body. The next time you are in a situation that causes an emotional and physical reaction, take a moment to: PAUSE, BREATH, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT, and then ACT. Take that PAUSE to connect your body and mind; take that BREATH to gain control so you BECOME AWARE of your emotions and actions; REFLECT on how you can better handle the situation, and then ACT with confidence and composure. Try to breath into the area of your body that feels tense—and let it go. Realize that this “upsetting” moment has passed so there is nothing you can do to change it. All you can do is focus on the moment at hand and how YOU can handle yourself best. When we recognize that we can only live in the moment and prevent our emotions from controlling us, we will then be able to walk around with less baggage and stress in our lives.

Know YOURSELF: What do you crave?

This next entry is about improving your relationship with food. It's impossible to break unhealthy eating habits without a strong mind-body connection; we all have to consider what nutrients we feed our bodies, and how we feel after we eat. To discuss this, I need the help of my two favorite concepts: to crave and to be satisfied. These words are so perfect and powerful. Rely on these words to guide your hunger and identify your needs. "To crave" is to have an intense desire for something. "To be satisfied" is to give full contentment to that desire/craving. I am not talking about going on a diet here, but stressing the importance of understanding your cravings. When we know ourselves really well, we are able to know what we need/ want in order to feel fulfilled and at ease. Having a healthy relationship with your food will make each day a little better. Most of us tend to eat whatever is put in front of us. We often base our food choices on cost or convenience. When we eat absentmindedly, we are not aware of what or how much we are eating. Our bodies and minds will always be affected by what we eat, and there is no denying it. True hunger exists only in the stomach, but sometimes we experience: hand, mouth, or eye hunger. This is where my favorite words come into action: crave and satisfied. I always check in with myself before a meal or snack and think, “hmmm,…what am I craving right now? What does my body/mind need in order to feel satisfied?” By connecting your mind to your body, you understand when you are hungry, what foods irritate your body, and what foods you digest well. You may find out you're lactose intolerant or allergic to gluten. Lots of women also have low iron and need more meat. Most of us do not spend the time figuring out what works for our bodies because we do not know our bodies. For instance, I tend to crave a lot of vegetables and when I do not have enough vegetables during my day, I notice my body does not feel as hydrated and I do not feel as clear headed. I know I am lucky to crave vegetables, but I also have a serious chocolate/ sweet tooth. If I do not have something sweet and delicious EVERYDAY, I do not feel satisfied. However, I try not to abuse my cravings. It is obviously not good to eat too much of anything so I try to choose rationally and taste out what I am craving. This allows my one treat for the day to really hit the spot so I feel satiated.

Emotional eating, however, is never satisfied by food. Some people eat to numb feelings like: loneliness, anxiety, boredom, stress, sleepiness or depression. We eat and we keep eating to fill an emotional void. However, if we really KNOW OURSELVES then we slowly learn that food cannot satisfy us in that way. Knowing ourselves and what foods we crave allows us to make reflective and conscious food choices.

My suggestion: PAUSE, BREATH, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT. Use this as a tool to connect your mind and body so you can understand your cravings. Pay attention to your body and mind after you have eaten and ask yourself: "Am I satisfied? Am I too full? Did something I ate not feel right? Did something I ate really hit the spot?” Learn to listen to these signals from your body, and eat with more intention. Also, you may try cutting your portion of food in half and taking a moment to PAUSE, BREATH, BECOME AWARE and REFLECT. Take this moment before ACTING again to check in with your body to see if your stomach is still hungry (not your eyes, hands or mouth). If your stomach is still hungry then do not restrict yourself, but keep enjoying your meal. If your stomach is full, then save the rest of your meal and use it for lunch the next day! Do not criticize or be hard on yourself about food choices, but learn for next time so you can feel better/ stronger in the future.

Live each day satisfying yourself and listening to your cravings. See how much more content you will feel!

Remember, one body, one mind. Treat them right

Discovering What Makes YOU Happy

These next series of blog entries are about knowing yourself.  Part of being mindful is about getting in touch with your inner thoughts and learning how those thoughts are connected to your body.   One of my goals is to get people to hear themselves a little better so they can create an hour, to a day, to years of a happier and healthier life.  Be mindful: stay true to your personal beliefs and act with confidence, sincerity and passion. Live the lives you wish to lead, and be resilient against challenges from your external environments. When we take care of ourselves and act to the best of our ability, we are better apt to nurture others and the world around us This first entry is about knowing what makes you happy: When you hit rough patches in life, find little things that give you pleasure so that you have the strength to keep fighting on. Knowing what makes you happy and incorporating those little (or big) joys into your daily routine is essential to being a healthy/functional human being.  These joys can include: starting your morning with a yummy cup of coffee, reading a good book, talking to someone you care about, doing an art project, saying something nice to yourself, exercising, playing sports or planning exciting trips.  Have hobbies and activities that give YOU something to look forward to and bring YOU pure enjoyment!

While I was sailing through my own personal shit storm, I had a hard time finding the light in the day.   I wasn't fully depressed, but I felt I was moving aimlessly through the days, yearning to feel any morsel of happiness I could grab. I found comfort and excitement in my days by exercising; I felt blood running through my body and got a burst of natural endorphins.  I treated myself to a yummy cup of coffee and something chocolately and I became mindful of the environments where I felt my best.  I learned that if I cannot be fully happy right now, I should figure out what settings I felt best in.  I realized who I wanted to spend my time with and what my idea of “fun” consisted of.  I also felt better whenever I helped others.  I did little things throughout my day like: smiling at strangers, making small talk with my bus driver, and holding doors open for other people. I saw how my behavior positively affected others and it made me feel better.   I also learned, and am continuing to learn, how to clean my life of toxic people, toxic thoughts and toxic behaviors. It makes no sense to live a moment of your life not at your best!  In order to do this, you have to know and hear yourself.

Suggestions: Spend some quiet time with yourself: meditate, write in a journal or think out loud in the shower.  Get in touch with your true self and discover hobbies that bring you joy.  If you are at a point in your life where you do not know what brings you joy, that is perfectly normal- most of us do not! Once you recognize that you're struggling to find happiness, you can break out of your shell and experience the world around.  Why not learn a new language, wear your favorite color, train for a triathlon, or start acting classes??? In trying new things, you will figure out what feels good to YOU.  We tend to lose sight of the little things in life that bring us joy so it is important to: PAUSE, BREATH, BECOME AWARE, REFLECT and ACT in a manner that suits YOU best.

After you learn what you like, incorporate your new hobbies into your daily routine.  This is vital! You need to take care of yourself mentally and physically every day. Take action in the day and do not let it slip away.  Develop a schedule, and don't forget to make time for yourself.  I know we all feel extremely busy, but you are no use to anyone else if you are not looking after yourself .  Doing at least one thing a day that makes you happy will add more light to your life, which means you will have more light to shine on others.

Be happy, Be healthy!

Inner and Outer Strength

When most people think of "strength", they think of the superficial physicality of someone: how big their muscles are, how much they can bench press. However, a lot of the time, we do not focus on people’s inner strength. By inner strength, I mean the ability to cultivate a stable sense of self. When you have a firm inner foundation you are able to stay grounded when the wind blows or the earth shakes. However, having a strong sense of self with confidence, pride and the ability to think rationally does not come easily to most people especially in the face of chaos. When my life was shaken upside down due to the trauma of going through chemo and the heartbreak of losing my mother, I had to learn how to hone in on my inner strength in order to stay a float. I had to scramble inside of myself to create confidence and strength as I looked at my superficial self in the mirror and could not understand how I was losing my hair, my partner in crime, my femininity. How was I suppose to tackle this difficult world when I did not look or feel like myself? I decided I had to create my own inner confidence and strength and could no longer rely on the superficial signals from our image-obsessed Western society. While I meditated, I would image breathing in positive energy to give me strength to sit up taller and stronger. With each inhale, I would feel space grow between my vertabrea as my shoulder blades drew down my back, making it so my heart center stayed open to give positive energy while my stance aimed to embody the strength of a mountain.

You know how people always comment how intimidating tall people are? Well, I felt I just had to create a straighter and more confident presence that would prevent anyone from questioning why I was wearing a hat all the time. I had to search for my inner dignity and allow that to shine.

Sitting up straight and having good posture is not only important for how you physically carry yourself, but it is also important for your internal organs. Sitting up straight allows there to be enough space for your organs to function properly. Most of us spend too much time hunched over a computer, which is detrimental to both the physical and mental state of our bodies.

THIS MUST CHANGE.

Suggestions: Doing Pilates is an amazing way to to create length in the spine and core strength so you are able to physically sit up taller. You have to strengthen those tiny muscles so it becomes easier over time. Some daily tips are just to start becoming more mindful of your body. Try sitting up tall for five minutes and then relax to your normal slouched position. You will see how much weaker you feel in the slouched state. Yes, it maybe more “comfortable” at first, but once you get strong enough to sit up straight, you will never want to feel or look like a baked potato again. Find that inner dignity within yourself and present yourself like a strong mountain so nothing in this world can knock you over.

Monkey Mind

Whenever I'm in a state of distress, I blame it on my "monkey mind".  My mother was the first person to explain the "monkey mind" to me: it is the internal, negative voice in our heads that causes anxiety. The monkey mind makes you imagine the worst possible scenario for every intimidating situation- it makes you feel like you have no control over your life. The MM is sneeky and it can invade your entire realm of consciousness if you do not learn how to tame it. My monkey mind always acts up whenever I start something new or make important life decisions: fears of failure and unhappy thoughts jump around in my mind and paralyze me from enjoying the moment at hand.  I end up wasting time and energy fearing what might happen instead of concentrating on what is actually happening in the present.  Letting your monkey mind control you is very dangerous: you lose your sense of self and your ability to act rationally.

My most recent encounter with my monkey mind was a few days ago when I taught my first Pilates class in Buenos Aires.  I feared that no one would show up and people wouldn't think I was a good teacher.  All of these negative thoughts bombarded my mind and left me feeling weak and incapable.  I put my monkey mind aside, taught my first Pilates class and, in reality, none of my fears came true! All the negative self-talk I experienced was just my MM going wild.  Now I keep myself one step ahead of my monkey mind. When I feel my MM becoming active, I'm able to regain a sense of stability by connecting with my breath and letting all my toxic fears float away.  Why should you surround yourself with negative energy and doubt?  You want to surround yourself with good thoughts and face each day with confidence and determination.  Do not let those mights or what ifs.. get in the way of you maintaining your composure.

Suggestions: Whenever your mind starts racing and you feel yourself being flooded by negative self-talk: STOP IT. Take a moment to yourself, breath and let those punishing thoughts go.  Have faith that everything will work out. Your life may not be going exactly as you'd like it to, but there is always a solution: nothing is insurmountable.  We may not be able to control the events in our lives, but we can control our reactions to them. It is important to learn what is worth spending our energy on and what is worth letting go.  Do not hold onto extra baggage- it will only weigh you down.

Take care of your mind and body and you will be better-prepared to combat the toxic world we live in.